Below is an email to a friend/co-worker of mine whose name also happens to be James. I sent it to him after he didn't show up for work on Monday or Tuesday. Please enjoy...
From: James [Me]
Sent: Tuesday, November 22, 2005 2:17 pM
To: James [not Me]
Subject: Hate Mail from yours truly
James James James…
Did you think people wouldn’t find out the truth? Did you think we’d go along with your story? Did you seriously think you could get away with all the lies? Huh!? Huh?! HUH!?!?! Did you think that?!
Well, you were wrong… in fact… DEAD wrong.
Some cover story – food poisoning. Sure – that seems very likely. But it’s all a little TOO convenient… Perhaps we would have believed you if you have used a more clever excuse like alien abduction – or sex change operation. But, seriously man, food poisoning!?! Who gets that these days what with computers and the internet and such…
We know the truth – it’s SO obvious now – the timing works perfectly – and to be honest – I was a fool to not see it before.
You bought a new Xbox 360, didn’t you, you smug bastard.
You took Monday so you could stand in line and be the first to get your greedy, dirty, little hands on it. And you took Tuesday off so you could sit on your arse and play it all day. Frankly, none of this surprises me, not one little bit. But what ticks me off the most, what DOES surprise me, is that you didn’t even invite me.
Tsk tsk tsk…