Monday, May 15, 2006

The Four Cats!

An Accountant, a Chemist, an Engineer, and an Accounts Payable Supervisor were bragging about how smart their cats were.

The Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies. Everyone agreed that was good.

The Chemist said his cat could do even better. He called his cat and said, "Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass. Everyone agreed that was pretty good.

To show off, the Engineer said to his cat,"T-square, do your stuff." T-square pranced over to the desk, took out paper and pen, and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was really smart.

Then the Accountant, Chemist, and Engineer turned to the Accounts Payable Supervisor and said, "What can your cat do?"

The Accounts Payable Supervisor called his cat and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff."

Coffee Break jumped to his feet and...
ate the cookies...
drank the milk...
and pooped on the paper.

Then he made love with the other three cats...
claimed he injured his back while doing so...
filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions...
put in for Workers Compensation...
and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

[joke credits go to my father]

9 comments:

Ferda said...

he made love with all the other male cats? I don't know cats could swing that way...

James said...

they weren't male cats. they were female cats. Don't suggest anything about the accounts payable supervisor's cat's sexuality.

Ferda said...

and I quote...

"Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies."

James said...

DOH!

Matt said...

James,

I think you need to take your Cat to Big Gay Al's Animal Sanctuary.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Gay_Al's_Big_Gay_Boat_Ride

James said...

man - I thought this was a funny joke. Never did I think it would raise questions about my (theoretical) cat's sexuality....

jamesmo said...

I don't think it is the cat's sexuality we are questioning...

James said...

that's enough

Ferda said...

bwahahaahahahaha